Building Rapport Strategies

The biggest rapport mistake consultants make happens in the first 60 seconds of a meeting. They go straight into the work. The agenda, the deliverables, the update. No warmth, no connection, no human moment before the business begins. Then they wonder why the client doesn't fully trust their advice. The relationship stays transactional. The client holds back context, filters their concerns, and eventually starts shopping around. The missing ingredient is almost always the same. The client doesn't feel seen. One of the simplest techniques I teach to fix this is called the ACA Framework. Acknowledge → Compliment → Ask. 1. Acknowledge what someone has just told you. 2. Find something genuine to compliment within it. 3. Ask a further question that lets them go deeper. Here's what it sounds like in practice: Acknowledge → "So you managed to launch a new product while restructuring the entire engineering team?" Compliment → "That's seriously impressive project management!" Ask → "I'd love to know how did you keep both parts moving without one suffering?" This is rapport building in three sentences. The reason this works so well is that universally, people love to feel seen and appreciated. When a client feels like you're genuinely interested in them as a person, they share more context, more concerns, more of the real picture. That's where the best consulting happens. In the stuff the client tells you when they trust you enough to be honest. The ACA framework is a small habit that compounds over time. Use it in your first meeting with a new client. Use it in a catch-up with a stakeholder you're struggling to connect with. Use it at a networking event when you're stuck for conversation. It works everywhere because the principle behind it never changes. People want to feel heard. 💬 Try this in your next client conversation and let me know how it goes 🔁 Share this with a colleague who's client-facing 🔔 Follow Will Bremridge for practical communication tools for tech and finance consultants.

Recently a colleague asked me, “Laura, how are you able to get a group of complete strangers to bond so quickly?” It made me pause and reflect on my approach. Creating a strong bond among individuals is rooted in fostering psychological safety, shared experiences, and vulnerability. Here are some strategies I employ: 1. Establish a Shared Purpose Early On: - Define the group's purpose clearly. - Focus on the intention behind the gathering, promoting authenticity over perfection. 2. Initiate Vulnerability-Based Icebreakers: - Dive beyond surface-level introductions by asking meaningful questions: - "What's a personal achievement you're proud of but haven't shared with the group?" - "What challenge are you currently facing, big or small?" - "What truly motivated you to join us today?" These questions encourage genuine connections by fostering openness and humanity. 3. Engage in Unconventional Activities Together: - Bond through unique experiences such as: - Light physical activities (get outside and take a walk) or team challenges. - Creative endeavors like collaborative projects or improvisation. - Reflective exercises such as guided meditations followed by group reflections. 4. Facilitate "Small Circle" Conversations: - Encourage deeper discussions in smaller groups before sharing insights with the larger group. - Smaller settings often lead to increased comfort, paving the way for more profound interactions in larger settings. 5. Normalize Authentic Communication: - Lead by example as a facilitator or leader by sharing genuine and unexpected thoughts. - Setting the tone for open dialogue encourages others to follow suit. 6. Highlight Common Ground: - Acknowledge shared themes and experiences after individual shares. - Recognize patterns like shared pressures, transitions, or identity struggles to unify the group. 7. Incorporate Group Rituals: - Commence or conclude sessions with grounding rituals like breathwork, gratitude circles, one on one share. In what ways have you been able to create cohesion quickly amongst a group of individuals in a training session? #fasttracktotrust #humanconnection #facilitatedconnection

How I Built Rapport With Difficult Stakeholders at Amazon (Without trying to “win” every conversation.) One of the biggest surprises of my career? The hardest stakeholders usually weren’t difficult people. They were people under pressure. Executives had aggressive goals. Engineering had limited bandwidth. Product wanted more features. Operations wanted fewer changes. Everyone had competing priorities. My job as a Program Manager wasn’t to eliminate conflict. It was to build enough trust that we could work through it. Here are a few things that made the biggest difference. 1/ Assume positive intent This changed everything. Instead of thinking: “They’re blocking my project.” I started asking: “What pressure are they under that I can’t see?” That simple shift made me more curious… And a lot less defensive. 2/ Learn what success looks like for them Not for your program. For them. Every stakeholder has KPIs. Deadlines. Bosses. Constraints. The more I understood what they were optimizing for… The easier it became to find solutions that worked for both of us. 3/ Never surprise people Bad news isn’t what damages relationships. Surprises do. If a milestone was slipping… Or a risk was growing… I’d tell stakeholders early. Even if I didn’t have the solution yet. People trust transparency more than perfection. 4/ Listen longer than feels comfortable I used to jump into problem-solving too quickly. Over time I realized… Most stakeholders wanted to feel understood before they wanted advice. Sometimes the fastest way to solve a problem… Was to spend an extra five minutes listening. 5/ Deliver on the small things Trust isn’t built during major launches. It’s built when you consistently do what you said you were going to do. Send the follow-up. Close the loop. Respond when you said you would. Small promises become a reputation. One lesson from Amazon has stayed with me: You don’t build rapport by being the smartest person in the room. You build it by becoming the most reliable. Because when people know you’ll communicate honestly, follow through, and help solve problems… The “difficult stakeholder” often becomes your biggest advocate. 📬 I write every week about leadership, execution, AI, and lessons from my 5.5 years at Amazon. Join 1600+ professionals here: 👉 https://lnkd.in/e6qAwEFc What’s been your most effective strategy for building trust with a difficult stakeholder?

The other day I wrote about how brands need to rethink their media relations programs. Here's where I'd start, and what I've learned. Find the voices that influence the influencers. Last week at the IMM travel media conference in London, one of the world's leading travel editors mentioned that they look to trade media for their story ideas. Trade media is a perfect example of what I'm talking about here: niche, trusted, deeply read by exactly the right people. Before you go wide, understand who the core few are that shape how the influential think. Those are the relationships worth building first. Do your homework. But really do it. That means subscribing, following, reading, engaging — and doing it over time. There are no shortcuts here. You cannot decide someone is worth approaching without actually living in their world for a while. It might take months. That's ok. Find the genuine intersection. There has to be a real reason for your brand and this person to be in conversation. Not a stretch. If something in your gut says it won't work, trust that. One or two real relationships is worth more than twenty weak ties. Spar with them. Test your thinking. Debate and build on their ideas. Learn from their community. This is what separates a transactional relationship from a real one and it's what makes it possible for them to create something valuable for their readers. Treat them the way you'd treat anyone you're genuinely trying to build a relationship with. Make it worth their time in a way that respects who they are. Not a press release. Not an unsolicited send out. An experience, unique access, a conversation, a room they'd appreciate being in, something specific and considered that lets them encounter your brand on their own terms and form their own view. Play a long game. The goal is a relationship that goes in both directions. The brands that win are the ones that show up consistently, generously, and without an agenda attached to every interaction. Stop thinking about this as media relations. Use the same muscles you use when you're forming a genuine friendship: ask questions, get to know someone, build rapport, do nice things for them, be thoughtful. The brands that get this right aren't running a comms plan playbook. They're just being human.

Don't call customer service soft skills. This 3-part framework makes them just skills. 📚A quick history lesson before we dive in... The term "soft skills" likely originated with the U.S. Army in the 1960s. The Continental Army Command regulation 350-100-1 defined them this way: "job related skills involving actions affecting primarily people and paper, e.g., inspecting troops, supervising." Over time, "soft skills" have come to mean two things to trainers: 1. Interpersonal skills, like customer service 2. Vague skills that are hard to define or measure 🫤 It's the second part that hurts training. You can't consistently train or evaluate a skill that isn't clearly defined or measurable. In 1972, the Continental Army Command held a soft skills training conference to tackle this issue. Dr. Paul G. Whitmore from HumRRO (a contractor) presented a framework to make soft skills easier to evaluate: 1. What is the purpose of the skill? 2. What are typical situations where this skill is used? 3. What behaviors will successfully achieve the purpose? This framework works really well for customer service skills. 🤝 Let's use rapport as an example. The scenario is receptionists at a health club: 1. What is the purpose of building rapport with customers? ↳ Rapport creates a positive experience that encourages prospective members to join, encourages existing members to renew, and makes it easier to quickly solve problems. 2. What are typical situations where rapport is used? ↳ Examples where the health club receptions might use rapport skills include: ✅ Welcoming new and prospective members ✅ Greeting existing members ✅ Assisting members with membership-related issues 3. What specific rapport behaviors should receptionists exhibit? ↳ A few things might be on this list: (1) Use welcoming body language, such as a friendly wave and a smile. (2) Give visitor a friendly greeting such as "Welcome," "Good morning!", or "Hey (name of member)!" (3) Learn and use member names (4) Demonstrate an interest in the member Yes, this takes a bit more effort upfront to define each customer service skill. Here's the payoff: Clear expectations + consistent training + easy evaluation = Skills

In tough conversations, we’re told to build rapport. 🤝🏿 But let’s go deeper. Let’s talk about bias. 👀 Most people hear that word and think: “Bias = bad.” ❌ But bias isn’t evil. It’s human. 🧠 It’s how our brains try to make sense of the world. The real danger? When bias influences our decisions without us realizing it. ⚠️ In negotiation and business, we can’t ignore bias— But we can learn to work with it. So here’s my mindset 👇🏿 The more different I am from someone… The more likely in-group/out-group bias might be working against me. My strategy? I slow down. 🛑 I listen deeply. 👂🏿 I lead with empathy. 💬 I learn what they value, what drives them, and what they relate to. Then, I highlight the parts of myself that align with those things. I help them say, “Hey, Kwame is one of us.” 🙌🏾 That’s affinity bias—and in this case, I’m using it on purpose. Not to manipulate. But to connect. Because when people feel like you’re in their group… They trust you more. They open up. They say yes. ✅ This tactic has been misused in harmful ways. But in ethical communication, negotiation, and persuasion… It’s a powerful tool to build real rapport. 💡 💬 Have you ever noticed bias working against you—or used connection to turn it in your favor? Also check out more of my conversation with Tony Anagor on his podcast 🎙️🚀 👉🏿 : https://lnkd.in/etRjeq7X #RelationshipBuilding #Negotiation #Business

Legendary self help author Dale Carnegie would have also been a great PR firm leader. His lessons on human behavior remain relevant to all aspects of PR, media, and advocacy. Here’s my top 10 lessons applied to our work: 1️⃣ Don’t default to criticize, condemn, or complain—argue strategically. Attacking for the sake of attacking is a waste of time. Even in the worst disagreements, focus on credibility, trust, and alliances. The best reputation strategy isn’t about tearing others down, it’s about making your message the most compelling to the most people. 2️⃣ Appreciation is free PR. People remember who gives them credit. The best executives, policymakers, and communicators understand that sincere appreciation builds relationships that pay off long-term. 3️⃣ Make people want to listen. Nobody cares about your agenda unless it aligns with theirs. Whether pitching the media or persuading policymakers, understand what they need first—then craft your message accordingly. 4️⃣ Relationships usually drive influence. Your network is your power. Carnegie knew it, and the best PR pros and policymakers live by it. The more goodwill you bank, the more leverage you have when it matters. 5️⃣ Be approachable—seriously. A smile (or its digital equivalent) is a game changer. The best leaders make people want to engage with them. That’s how you win advocates, not just followers. 6️⃣ Names still really matter. If you’re dealing with the media, lawmakers, or industry leaders, remember their names. People notice, and it builds instant rapport. 7️⃣ Shut up and listen. The best PR and advocacy wins don’t typically come from shouting the loudest. They come from listening, understanding, and then delivering the right message at the right time to the right audience using the right medium. 8️⃣ Frame everything in terms of your audience. Whether you’re influencing a journalist, a policymaker, or the public, make the conversation about them, not you. It’s how you make an argument stick. 9️⃣ Make people feel important genuinely. In media, politics, and business, perception is reality. Treat people like they matter, and they’ll return the favor when it counts. 🔟 The best way to win a fight? Avoid it strategically. Some battles need to be fought. Many don’t. The goal isn’t to “win” a media war or policy debate at any cost (aka “burn it all down”), it’s to build long-term credibility, influence, and trust. Carnegie understood people. And in PR, media, and advocacy, understanding people and what motivates is still everything. Any other lessons you’d add here on 🐪 Day?

Driving business on LinkedIn and with multiple channels isn't just about what you sell; it's about... ✅ Building genuine human connections and ✅ Providing what THEY think is valuable, not what we perceive as value When I first started using LinkedIn, I thought it was all about showcasing my skills and portfolio (I have some impressive content), but I quickly learned that people connect with people first. 🤝 It's really like old-fashioned dating, but for business. You have to get to know people, understand their world, and find ways to genuinely support them. Applying systems thinking to this kind of "dating" approach has been monumental for my business. ✨ Here's the breakdown of what that looks like in practice: ★ THE BUSINESS DATING FORMULA: 1⃣ Understand the "Dating Pool": Know whom you're trying to connect with. What are their challenges? What drives them? 2⃣ Pre-Date Research: Just like in real dating, do your homework. Look at their profile, their posts, and what they're talking about. Put in the effort. 3⃣ Value-First Conversations: Instead of jumping straight into a pitch, focus on genuine conversation. Ask thoughtful questions and, most importantly, listen more than you talk. Build trust. 4⃣ Offer Support (No strings attached): Find a way to help them, even in a small way, without expecting anything in return. This builds immense goodwill and positions you as a valuable resource. ✅ 5⃣ Build Rapport Over Time: Real connections aren't built in a single interaction. Nurture the relationship. Stay top-of-mind by consistently providing value and engaging in meaningful ways. My work isn't always strictly about business; sometimes it's about what's happening in my life. 🙆🏼 💁🏻♂️ 🙋🏻♀️ People want to know you're human, who's behind the scenes. For example, I'm a single father, I was in the US Army, and I've learned so much from family and good friends. These personal touches allow people to see if we share a similar moral structure and that we could connect on a deeper level. → That makes you more relatable and trustworthy. I always aim to be real, even if it's not always the popular choice. It's about authenticity and building relationships based on trust and mutual respect. This has also led to some incredible partnerships and friendships. If you're looking to enhance your LinkedIn strategy and build stronger relationships, consider how to apply these "dating" principles. It's about being intentional, providing value, and fostering genuine connections. It's a reminder that at the end of the day, business is about people, and people connect with other people they know, like, and trust. 🤝 If you have ideas, questions, or need a little support, drop a line in the comments. Alternatively, you can go to my LinkedIn profile and use the booking link for a convo ☎️ 🙋🏻♀️ QUESTION: What’s one way you’re currently building authentic connections in your business? #businessdevelopment #relationships #networking

One of the most overlooked business development opportunities is also one of the simplest: Show up with something helpful—especially when no one asked you to. Not with a pitch. Not with a sales message. Just with value. This kind of effort is what builds strong, long-term relationships. It’s the follow-up after a matter closes. The check-in that isn’t tied to a new engagement. The introduction between two people in your network who should know each other. The upside isn’t always immediate or obvious. But that’s exactly why it works. Clients and contacts remember the lawyers who bring value consistently, not just when there’s a deal to close or a bill to send. They remember who paid attention. Who thought of them. Who helped without being asked. And lawyers are uniquely well-positioned to do this kind of thing. You’re in the flow of information. You see developments across industries. You’re connected to smart people in different spaces. You sit at a vantage point where you know things others don’t—and you often know who would find those things useful. That gives you a wide range of ways to "show up": - Share a relevant article with a brief “thought this might be helpful” note. - Flag a regulatory update you know your client hasn’t seen yet. - Make an intro between two people who share a challenge or a market. - Connect your client with a potential customer or client. - Offer a quick thought on something you saw in their industry that could affect them. None of these actions takes long. But they signal something powerful: I’m thinking about you. I want to help, even when I’m not being paid to. And that signal helps build strong relationship equity. Over time, these small moments add up. They build trust, credibility, and keep you top of mind when opportunity strikes Here's the strategy in a nutshell: - Be generous with what you know. - Be helpful when you don’t have to be. - And keep showing up—even when there’s nothing “in it” for you. Pick one contact today. Ask yourself, "How can I help this person?" Then do it. Let me know how it goes!