Communication Pitfalls To Avoid

He's going to quit... For the sake of privacy let's call this employee Joe. Joe was a top performer—engaged, positive, and someone his peers confided in. Management labeled him a "complainer". He’d point out how overrun meetings were unproductive, how the CEO’s morning rants were dragging down morale, and how management needed to step in because he didn’t want to be the team’s emotional sounding board. His feedback was always constructive, not complaining. He wanted things to improve. But over time, something changed... The feedback slowed. He stopped volunteering for projects. He wasn’t in my office anymore, sharing ideas. When I finally asked, “Hey, are you okay? I haven’t seen you around,” he replied: “Oh, yeah. Just been busy trying to keep my nose clean.” I flagged it to his manager, but nothing changed. Two weeks later, he resigned. Our COO asked him, “Please, tell us how we can make this work. We’ll do whatever it takes.” His answer was devastatingly clear: “I already did. You weren’t willing.” This was years ago and I still think about what I learned that day: 1️⃣ Feedback needs action. When someone takes the time to point out what’s wrong, you owe them a response—action, or at least acknowledgment. 2️⃣ Disengagement is a warning sign. When an engaged employee starts pulling back, it’s not just busyness. It’s a signal, and ignoring it is a mistake.

I used to get so stressed whenever someone gave me constructive feedback. But then I tried this: I proactively asked for feedback from a peer, with the instructions: "Tear this apart. Poke as many holes as you can." It worked for two reasons: 1️⃣ It gave them permission to be direct. 2️⃣ It made me less defensive because I'd asked for the hole-poking. Now we were on the same team, making the work stronger before it went to leadership. I was reminded of this listening to the latest storytelling with data podcast, where Cole Nussbaumer Knaflic and Alli Torban shared a few more ways to get better at receiving feedback: → Ask yourself: "How could they be right?" Before explaining or rejecting a comment, pause and find the useful part. (Alli's trick: treat bad feedback like a bad gift, try to find some potential use for it before dismissing it.) → Be specific about what you need. Instead of "Any thoughts?" try: - "Is the main message clear?" - "Where did you get confused?" - "What holes would a skeptical leader poke in this?" → Choose your feedback source intentionally. Sometimes you need a cheerleader. Sometimes you need a critic. Sometimes you need someone with zero context to tell you what's unclear. And when the feedback still stings? Steal their tip: Breathe through your nose, wiggle your toes. ——— Who's your go-to person for honest feedback on your work?

❌ Most founders fail at fundraising for the same reason they fail at sales: they avoid the follow-up. I was talking with a founder recently, and he shared something that really stayed with me. He wasn’t asking for advice he was reflecting on his own journey. “The way I ran my first company almost killed it. The second? I didn’t treat it the same way and that made all the difference.” His first venture grew out of an academic project. Brilliant, technical, endlessly fascinating. He iterated the product endlessly tweaking formulas, perfecting the science, optimising every detail. In doing so, he avoided the one thing that could have kept the company alive: consistent pipeline management. He didn’t chase clients, didn’t follow up when conversations stalled, and didn’t keep opportunities warm. Instead, he buried himself in technical work that felt productive. From an R&D perspective, it seemed like progress. In reality, the pipeline went cold, and deals slipped through his fingers. That company never really had a chance. Since then, I’ve worked closely with him on his second venture a chemical technology company developing scalable, sustainable solutions for industrial challenges. The sector is technical, capital-intensive, and competitive. The founder is still intensely technical, but this time, he approached the business differently. We've focused on building discipline around the work he used to avoid. He treated follow-ups, relationship maintenance, and pipeline tracking as non-negotiable. Every client conversation, every investor touchpoint, and every partnership opportunity was tracked, scheduled, and executed consistently. I helped him design systems, create routines, and hold himself accountable. He trained the “follow-up muscle” he had neglected in the first company. The results speak for themselves. Conversations that might have gone cold stayed alive. Strategic partners became advocates. Investors noticed his consistency and commitment leading to pre-seed investment. What he once dreaded relationship management and pipeline discipline are now some of his greatest strengths. Through this process, he’s learned and applied a powerful lesson: the technical brilliance that drove his first venture can only create value if paired with disciplined commercial execution. Product iteration alone doesn’t build a business. Sales discipline translates directly into investment discipline. Weaknesses aren’t permanent they can be trained like muscles. 🔥 For me, it’s been rewarding to see him transform his approach and transfer lessons from failure into success. Treating the second venture differently, showing up consistently for the uncomfortable essential work, and embedding that discipline into every part of the business became the foundation for growth, execution, and investor confidence. #founderstories #startups #innovation #raisingcapital #newableadvice

I watched a talented professional send 127 follow-up emails after interviews. Got replies from 3 companies. 2.3% response rate. Then she showed me what she was writing. I immediately knew why recruiters ignored her. Here's the truth about follow-ups: Most people remind recruiters they're desperate. Not that they're valuable. The typical follow-up: "Just checking in on my application..." "Any updates on the timeline?" Translation: "Please don't forget I exist." Recruiters read anxiety, not confidence. After years of coaching professionals, I've noticed: The follow-ups that get responses don't ASK for updates. They DELIVER value. Stop following up on YOUR need. Start following up with THEIR solution. Think: → What problem did they mention? → What insight can I share? → How can I make their decision easier? One client rewrote her follow-up: Instead of: "Any updates on the position?" She wrote "Hi [HR Manager Name ], been thinking about the bandwidth challenge you mentioned. Found an approach that might help—similar to what I used before. Would love to share if useful. Recruiter replied within hours. She shifted from "remember me?" to "I'm already solving your problems." The difference between ignored and responded follow-ups? One reminds them you're waiting. The other reminds them why they need you. Your follow-up isn't about checking their timeline. It's about them seeing you as the solution they can't ignore. People who add value get calls back. People who add pressure get silence. Stop checking in. Start showing up as the answer. PS: For more such content subscribe to my newsletter. Check out my feature section.

I suck at handling feedback. I keep reminding myself, “This isn’t personal.” But creative work is always, at least a little bit, personal. That’s why Julia Cameron’s 9 steps for dealing with criticism really hit hard. And I thought they might help you too, so I put together this cheat sheet: 1/ Get it over with: Receive the criticism all the way through. 2/ Notice what hurts: Highlight the phrases that bother you. 3/ Keep what’s useful. Mark anything that actually helps. 4/ Nurture yourself: Read an old positive review or recall a compliment. 5/ See the big picture: Even if this piece of work sucks, it’s probably a necessary stepping-stone to your next project. 6/ Dig into the pain: Does the feedback remind you of past criticism? It might be poking at an old childhood wound. 7/ Write a letter to the critic: Defend your work, but also acknowledge what was helpful. No need to send it. 8/ Commit to creating something new: Creativity is the only cure for criticism. 9/ Get back on the horse: Time to move on. Start your next project. I’ve been reading The Artist’s Way for a few weeks now, and it’s had a huge impact on my life and creative work. I highly recommend it :)

You know *logically* that constructive feedback is supposed to be helpful and support your growth and YET - you can't help but take it so damn personally? ARGHHH... I feel this one to the CORE. As a recovering perfectionist, every piece of 'feedback' that wasn't 'glowing' Used to feel like a dagger. I'd use it as a reason to beat myself up. I'd use it as evidence that I was a failure. I'd interpret it that I was crap at just about everything. If you are currently taking feedback as a personal attack, You need to learn how to hear it *without* spiralling. Here's the steps I took to relieve the pressure ⤵️ 1️⃣ I Detached My Identity from the Feedback. Criticism isn’t about you as a person—it’s about the work. Stop making it mean more than it does. 2️⃣ I decided *who* I would Listen To. Not all feedback is worth your energy. Would you trade places with the person giving it? If not, don’t let it in. 3️⃣ I saw Feedback as Growth. The most successful leaders seek out constructive criticism because they know it’s their fastest path to improvement. 4️⃣ I Reframed It as a Power Move. The best leaders don’t crumble under feedback—they use it as fuel. Turn critiques into opportunities and invitations to uplevel. 5️⃣ I had to learn to drop the Perfection. If you never get feedback, you’re either not pushing yourself hard enough or you’re surrounded by the wrong people. Growth requires friction. 6️⃣ I got to Control the Narrative. Is the feedback too vague or unhelpful? Ask for specifics. Get clarity. Make it work for you. ➡️ Remember: Truly Confident Women are not afraid to Take. Up. Space. (THANK GOODNESS) If you’re getting feedback, it means you’re in the game. The only people who never get criticised are the ones too afraid to show up 🤷♀️ So next time someone gives you constructive feedback? Take what you need. Leave the rest. And keep leading like you mean it. Let's hear the feedback you didn't agree with ⤵️ (Mine is ridiculous!)

I scored. But the ball hit my hand before going in. The referee called it a goal. I was tempted to say nothing. After all, I did not lie and I wasn't even completely sure that the ball hit my hand before going in. The referee might have got it right.I wasn't cheating. I was respecting the referee's decision. But that's BS. So I told ref what happened and he disallowed the goal. Anyway, it's just a football game. It's ok to slip up once in a while. Like overpromising and failing to deliver, embellishing during a performance review, overstating earnings to get that bonus. You tell yourself, "Just this once." But If you cross the line once, you make it easier to cross the line again and again ... until there is no line. And you turn into the kind of person you never intended to be. Remember Nick Leeson, the trader who brought down British merchant bank Barings in 1995 after racking up $1.3 billion in trading losses. It all started with one small error. But Leeson didn't want to admit his mistake and covered it up by hiding the loss in a trading account no made paid attention to. One cover-up led to another and another. The losses caused Barings to declare bankruptcy and twelve hundred employees lost their jobs. Leeson was sentenced to six and a half years in a Singaporean prison. And this all happened because Leeson decided to cover-up. He never knew there was no turning back. The late Clayton M Christensen who shared the Leeson story, is right "It's easier to hold to your principles 100% of the time than to hold on to it 98% of the time." I make mistakes. However, retaining integrity does not need me to be perfect. It requires me to do the right thing. When I stumble, I must admit it, own it, and make up for it. Otherwise, no one, including myself, will believe I will do better the next time. Do what is right and let the consequences follow. Come the next time I will be better. Then I can look my children in the eye and sleep well at night. Worth it. Agree?

“But, you said we will get 4x ROAS!” In our industry, there’s always someone making louder promises. It’s tempting to join the race, promise big numbers, get the deal, deal with the fallout later. But here’s what most people miss: It’s easy to talk up results in a pitch deck. It’s much harder to build real, repeatable success in the wild. That’s why I’m a firm believer in that classic advice (Tom Peters said it best): “Under promise and over deliver.” Not because I want to play it safe, or because we can’t achieve bold results. But because I’ve seen what happens when the entire ecosystem starts chasing unrealistic benchmarks. Margins shrink, trust erodes, and clients hop agencies the minute a new, shinier offer comes along. This isn’t just about protecting my agency. It’s about building a healthy market where fair pricing, sustainable growth, and honest expectations win out over one-upmanship. I’ve worked both sides: corporate and agency. I know how much pressure there is to show up with “guarantees.” But now, I’d rather have tough conversations up front than scramble for explanations later. In business and in life, overpromising looks flashy but rarely pays off. A spouse who hears “I’ll bring you the stars” is happy for a day. But it’s showing up, doing the work, and quietly delivering more than you promised, that’s what sticks. I’d rather be the one who delivers steady, compounding wins than someone chasing their own hype. If you’ve ever faced the pressure to “promise the moon,” you know how tempting it is. But the real win? Building trust that outlasts the campaign.

‎Maria is now jobless. ‎ ‎Not because she lacked skill, but because she resigned before anything was signed. ‎ ‎After four promising interview rounds, the hiring manager called and said, "We're excited to have you on board. HR will send the paperwork soon." ‎ ‎Out of excitement and trust, Maria handed in her resignation the next morning. ‎ ‎Two weeks later, the company froze hiring. ‎ ‎The paperwork never came. ‎ ‎That's how quickly a verbal promise can vanish. ‎ ‎A verbal offer is interest, not commitment. Until it's on paper, it's just talk. ‎ ‎Do this instead: ‎✅ After every interview, follow up by email to confirm next steps. ‎✅ Ask for details in writing — title, salary, start date, reporting line. ‎✅ Stay engaged at your current job until the formal offer arrives. ‎✅ Resign only after signing and returning your offer letter. ‎✅ Keep your options open; a verbal "yes" isn’t security. ‎ ‎A company's situation can change overnight. Budgets shift. Priorities move. ‎ ‎Protect yourself. ‎Trust the process, not the promise. ‎ ‎Because in your career, certainty lives on paper. ‎

You walked out of that meeting thinking it went well. But three days later, the deal fell through. Here’s what happened: You were listening to their words. They were showing you the truth with their body. Research on nonverbal communication shows we transmit a significant amount of our emotional meaning through body language — the micro-expressions, the posture shifts, the way someone angles their chair when they’re actually ready to leave. Yet most of us are walking around half-blind. We catch the obvious signs — crossed arms, eye rolls — but miss the subtle ones that tell the real story. The three cues I watch for in any high-stakes conversation: The Lean Test. When someone is genuinely interested, their body follows their attention. They lean in. Their feet point toward you. If they’re saying yes but angling toward the door, believe the body. The Eyebrow Flash. It’s involuntary — a quick lift that signals recognition and interest. Ethologist Irenaus Eibl-Eibesfeldt documented this across every culture he studied. In the first 2 seconds of meeting someone, this micro-expression tells you if they’re open to connection. The Self-Soothe. When someone touches their neck, plays with their hair, or adjusts their collar repeatedly, their nervous system is seeking comfort. They’re feeling uncertain, even if their words sound confident. Reading people isn’t about becoming a human lie detector. It’s about closing the gap between what someone says and what they feel — so you can respond to the actual conversation happening beneath the surface. What body language cue have you learned to trust over time?